dad unmasked

Sometimes it takes a real kick in the ass to put things about life into perspective. Over the past year, life was seriously kicking my ass, but some how I managed to keep going and not give up. Those experiences have left me deeply humbled. Here are a few things that I have learned and most of them I will continue to live by.

1. Money CAN contribute to happiness. And what I mean by happiness is being able to afford a decent roof over my kids’ heads, having good food on the table and having a safe place for them to play, feel comfortable and be happy. Money is needed for these things, therefore money is a factor in the equation of happiness.

2. Unless I win a multi-million dollar lottery, I will never be financially wealthy. But come to think of it, I am wealthy. I have a wealth of family and friends that I can turn to for emotional support. And most importantly, I have two beautiful little girls that provide me with a wealth of laughter, joy and diva drama. Therefore, I AM wealthy.

3. I DON’T need a BMW, a 4,000 sq. foot house, and a vacation home in Lake Tahoe. My Ford truck and small house will suffice.

4. You CAN live on the bare minimum. Minimal usage of electricity, gas and other consumables. I’ve made $5 stretch an entire week. It was tough, but I did it.

5.  Work is…. work. I have finally realized that I am one of few people that actually enjoy what they do for a living. Granted, I’ll never get rich from being a graphic designer, but how cool is it to get paid to make things pretty?

Like I said, life changing events can make a person “wake up and smell the coffee” as they say. The events in my life have made me, and will continue to make me, better, stronger, and faster.

Things are in perspective now. I am focused. *fists on waist as cape blows in the wind*

Stay tuned…

I just wanted to give a special thanks to all of my friends that have supported me, laughed at me and with me for the last few rough months. You guys are awesome and I am grateful for being in the company of such cool people.

My special thanks goes to (in no particular order):

@TheRealBecks

@dearmisterman

@WeaselMomma

@MiniMaura

@tyronem

@mommyisdating

@daNanner

@mochadad

@MyBottlesUp

@Kwanster

@johncaveosborne

@missu

@BabitosDad

@LilAsha

@KngtRdr

@DebJorge

@ezmomm

@lilmommasmom

@ChristieSays

@superduperjes

@ericdbolton

@LadyWanderlust

@1tru_kitty

@rreimund

@mjjaaska

@themommytsunami

@howefitz

@IlinaP

@pjmullen

@OutNumberedisMe

@primadanna

@JNez

@JonathanBrown

@TwIceGirl28

@iajephoto

Thanks again everyone for being super friends.

I had a Q&A session with the girls a few weeks ago. Today, they wanted to ask me a few questions. Here they are.

Q: What is your favorite movie?
A: That’s tough. I have so many favorite movies. Bad Boys 1 & 2, Star Wars, Mission Impossible, Black Hawk Down, Iron Man…the list is endless.
4 yo: Why are the boys bad and what are Star Warts?

Q: Do you think Daisy Scouts are cool?
A: I guess it’s pretty cool since you like it so much!
7 yo: Yay! And you get to take me to a meeting tomorrow! Great.

Q: What is your favorite animal?
A:  The Black Panther because they are sleek, black and can kick butt if you mess with them.
4 yo: Daddy, they don’t have butts that have tails! Whatever.

Q: Do you think you’re old?
A: I say no, but my driver’s license might say otherwise.
4 yo: Daddy, you ARE old because you have grey hairs and your knee hurts.

Q: Do you like Buddha (the dog)?
A: Sometimes but not when he farts, snores and steals my remote.
7 yo: Daddy!!

Q: Do you like your work?
A: Yes, but I need more of it. Like se…whoops! Never mind.
4 yo: I like your work too, but not when you have to take me to school and then I miss you!

My daughter, S and N never seem to get used to our morning routine. It’s never drama free, but we manage to get out of the door on time every morning. Here’s a typical morning at the DadUnmasked lair.

5:15 am: The alarm clock clock goes off. After slapping the snooze button 3 or 4 times, I turn over to see that once again, S and N have infiltrated my bed in the middle of the night. Nothing new there. I grab my robe and head to the kitchen to start the coffee. While the coffee is brewing, I stumble around trying to figure out what day it is. I almost always have to check the calendar. I know, I’m getting old.

After grabbing that first cup of joe, I wander the house looking for my glasses and eye phone. I also start up the laptop to check cnn, twitter, facebook, emails, etc., By now, the dog is ready to be let out. I grab a second cup of coffee and try to slip in any work I might have on the side.

6:30 am: The girls are still asleep while I shower and shave.

6:55 am: I grab my third cup of coffee and check Twitter again.

7:00 am: The fun begins. The girls whine and moan non stop. “I don’t want to get up!” “I’m tired!” “Leave me alone!”

7:10 am: After several warnings, the girls are up, grumbling and moaning, while brushing their teeth.

7:15 am: The girls are wide awake and are ready to get dressed. S, who is 7, carefully picks out her outfit being sure everything matches.

7:20 am: I attempt to help N, who is 4, pick out an outfit for school. The response is always, “Daddy, I can dress myself!” Not wanting any more drama, I leave the room.

7:30 am: I prepare S’s lunch and get them breakfast. I check Twitter again.

7:35 am: N runs out of her room. She always says, “Look Daddy! I dressed myself! Do I look pretty?” My response, “Of course sweetie, you are ALWAYS pretty to me.”

Recently, I was placed on part time status at the ad agency I work for due to the economic slowdown. My part time status means part time pay. Yep, never in my entire life had I ever taken a 50% pay cut. It’s like someone taking an axe and chopping you right at the knees. I also compare it to being junk punched by the Man of Steel over and over again. It not only hurt my wallet, but it also hurt my pride. For the first day or two, I was filled with depression and anger. How was I going to pay the mortgage and put food on the table for my kids? I finally snapped out of it and decided to man up. I pulled my kids out of before and after school care which is saving lots of cash. I now drop them off in the morning and pick them up right after school. They are loving it. Plus, it gives me more time to spend with them.

There’s a phrase I’ve used in the past, “I’ve got the skills to pay the bills.” I’ve decided to starting using it again and living by it. I dusted off the old print portfolio, updated my resume and online portfolio and went to work contacting as many people within my network as possible. There have been a few promising emails and phone calls and I was able to hustle up a freelance gig. That cash will come in handy to not only pay bills, but it will also help when Santa and his elves pay a visit to shake me down. Hopefully I’ll be able to secure a full-time gig or more freelance very soon. But in the meantime, I guess I’m a part time SAHD and a part time SAHH (stay-at-home hustler.)

By the way, to all of you full time stay-at-home moms and dads out there, I commend you. I find it very challenging doing it part time let alone full time. Cheers!